Angus Dei

I didn't get to Mass last weekend as a result of being out of town.

For some reason, I really "feel" it when I skip Mass. It's like I become more guarded, more closed, more tight-in-the-chest. I don't think it's that I feel guilty for missing (or if it is, then it's certainly different than every other form of guilt I've experienced.)

Regardless, I headed over to the Oratory tonight for Mass, and I'm glad I did. The Gospel was one of my favorites (this), and the short homily following it really made a good point.

He basically said that in a world where there might be little that we can actually control, one thing we can choose is to live in joy. The point of the Gospel was that it's easy to start resenting other people for not suffering as we might, and that the purpose of work isn't to make us expend effort for effort's sake, but to engage fully in whatever moment we find ourselves.

The priest also talked about how easy it is to become tempted away from joy, and I was reminded again of Buddhist philosophy that says that being too immersed in the world leads to suffering. It always surprises me that so many people who subscribe to the latter belief will write off Christianity for holding the former, mostly as a result of misunderstanding the Christian concept of "sin". "Sin" isn't supposed to be the exclusively subjective designation of a judgmental deity; rather, it's roughly defined as "that which separates us from God." Again, in this case, I don't think it's too useful to think of "God" in a specifically personified sense...the point is just that "sin" can be a useful framework for considering actions and results when it's not being co-opted for judging people.

I should also point out that the priest wasn't talking about "temptation" just for the sake of moralizing; he was trying to relate it back to his point about choosing fulfillment and making sure that we maintain agency over our own attitudes.

Yeah. The more I think about it, the fewer philosophical differences I can identify between the two. Catholicism is more comfortable for me, though. Even after meditating for awhile, even if it's a really good meditation, I just don't come out of it feeling the way I do coming out of Mass. Meh. I guess I don't have to be entirely rational all the time.