Yule-Season

I've been looking around at various religious belief structures over the past several months.

Well, that's kind of mis-statement. I've been looking around at various religions for years now - but this past summer, I moved to an apartment much farther from my office. That means I've had much more time in the car, which I've mostly filled with listening to various podcasts.

When I was in high school, I took up paganism very briefly. Mostly, it was to be different.

However, I'm revisiting some of those ideals and beliefs now. Something that I still struggle with is the idea of structure - I actually took a lot of comfort in the "structure" of the Church - feeling like there was some validation in practicing something that was carefully designed and vetted by the highest "authority." Paganism is kind of odd because it's one big mishmash of meditative practices and worship of a multitude of deities. It's hard, I think, to get into a religious lifestyle practicing as a pagan simply because there's not as much community.

However, I digress.

One thing that really appeals to me about the pagan mindset (and about some aspects of certain Christian and other faith-based mindsets) is the idea of responsibility. I've seen very little toleration for the helpless victim mindset within pagan communities, and I think that's a great thing. A common Christian theme can be (depending on the Christian community) that "God will provide, God causes everything, God decides everything." The typical Christian argument is that to think or act otherwise is an act of arrogance - how dare we deign to think that we could have absolute power? How dare we get caught up in thinking that we have the ability to shape fate?

While certainly arrogance is unproductive and ultimately harmful, I think that in most cases we are actually more capable of influencing our own lives than we think - and I don't even mean through prayerful intercession, spellcasting, etc - I mean just by recognizing the various factors that come together to create a situation, and by taking the responsibility to interact with those factors in a way that is productive, rather than throwing up our hands and whining.

My favorite example is that of the relationship in which the two participants are of opposing faith systems. I think that most people would agree that when a Christian is in a relationship with a non-Christian, it can tend to make the Christian want to evangelize. It can also lead to discussions with the Christian's church group about how awful it is that their partner hasn't seen the light, and that the other person needs to be prayed for, and saved. I think that it's easy for that Christian's community to see the complainant in a very sympathetic way. (I've seen it happen, and to some extent had it happen to me - I went through a breakup a few years ago in which the ex's Mom told me that if I worked really hard to find Jesus, then her son might eventually want me back. Which helped make the breakup a lot easier for me, actually...)

However, when a very similar topic was brought up within a pagan community, the response was much different. It was basically, "Hey - it stinks that your partner won't support you. But - what the heck are you doing sticking with someone who is so critical of who you are? Why are you looking for sympathy instead of doing something proactive for yourself? Why are you willing to suffer, and be judged?"

So - again - I always argue for moderation. Certainly a world without compromise and understanding is a dismal one, indeed. But - if a situation seems to be beyond compromise and understanding, then yes - yes, I agree wholeheartedly that the responsibility lies with the suffering person to, for goodness' sake, respect and care for their own self enough to maybe do something drastic like saying, "You don't respect me - it's time for you to hit the road."

It's so, so, easy to make excuses. I love the idea of a spiritual practice that won't tolerate excuse making.

On that note, I've decided not to make excuses for not keeping up with people. If you're reading this and would like a Christmas/Yule/Holiday card, just e-mail me your address.

PS: For a great podcast about spirituality, and some pagan topics, check out: spiritscast.com