Last night I was so tired that I literally passed out in the middle of writing.
What I didn't say is that, until recently, I always thought it was kind of frivolous for a woman to hold onto her maiden name - it seemed as though taking her husband's name did a lot to create a new family unit - instead of "you + me" it becomes "us." I understand that, and still agree with the idea that a new family should reflect that it is a new family, and not appendages of other families, bound together. I'm still not sure that I have a definite opinion on last names, either way.
There are a lot of times in life when a little acceptance seems necessary - if everyone fulfilled every impulse they had, and every desire they wanted - especially in the name of fulfilling ideological beliefs*, I think in the long run things would fall apart a little bit - cohesiveness and relationships would certainly suffer.
As with most (all?) things, I suppose the answer is moderation - knowing where to find the line of reasonableness, and respecting that.
*I really do think that any strict ideology in the end does become self-limiting.
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